Taking the Plunge
When the folks here at Suboxone Blog asked me to write a few guest posts, I was flattered and really excited. I also thought the writing would be easy. It’s easy enough for me to bang out posts over at Diary of a Quitter, after all.
But every time I sat down to write this introductory post, I froze. Even thinking about sitting down to write stirred up feelings of mild panic. I kept procrastinating until last night when I realized that this is exactly the kind of thing that’s always getting me into trouble. I can’t expect to grow, in my life or in my recovery, if I refuse to do anything new or a little scary.
I felt the same way right after I realized that I needed help with my opiate addiction - scared and panicked. After abusing prescription painkillers for over a year and failing repeated attempts to quit, I knew I was in trouble. Getting high wasn’t even part of the picture for me anymore. I just took the pills to keep from getting sick. Lonely and isolated, I grew more and more depressed. My online searches for a way out of my mess turned up information about Suboxone, but shame and fear kept me from taking that final step. Asking for help felt like the end of the world.
Lucky for me, a good friend started Suboxone treatment right before I did. Seeing what Suboxone did for her eased my fears, and we have been able to support each other through this experience.
I also sought support online. I started my blog about a week before I began treatment, and over the past months I’ve built a network of friends who are also in the process of addiction recovery. Everyone needs friends in life, and people struggling with addiction are no different. In fact, we probably need them more.
Suboxone Blog was one of the first that I read on a regular basis. I’m glad to be able to share my story as a guest blogger. I found information and support here, and I hope you will, too. Suboxone treatment saved me. I still have work to do, but looking back to where I was six months ago, and where I was headed…I know that this medication made it possible for me to turn my life around.
If you are suffering right now, make the call and ask for help. Believe me, it will be the best thing you ever do for yourself.
-bottlecappie
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March 11th, 2008 at 10:53 am
[…] suboxone blog About a month ago, the folks at Suboxone Blog asked me to be a guest blogger. Well, my first post is up […]
March 11th, 2008 at 12:08 pm
Sounds like good advice to me BC. What is it they say - “surrender to win”? Kudos.
March 11th, 2008 at 5:58 pm
I’m glad you’re better and that you’re taking healthy risks. It’s something I need to learn to do myself. Stick with it.
March 11th, 2008 at 7:20 pm
Keep putting one front of the other, bc! Nice start.
March 11th, 2008 at 7:43 pm
I feel like a proud Mamma reading your first guest post…… *sigh*
I remember that I had been blog-surfing for quite awhile, looking for other people who were experiencing the “Suboxone Method” of withdrawal and/or recovery. Most blogs were set up by either health institutions, doctors or rehabs. There were a few people who began to blog about their use of Sub’s, but no one ever kept up with their postings.
When I found your blog, I was elated. Not only to find a fellow Sub user, but to finally read some raw honesty about their joys and struggles.
There has been many times when you have “visited” me and shared your own opinions/views on my situation at the time of my posting. I have found more than not your advice/opinions were usually dead on!
Thank you so much for being here, in cyberspace, to share your experience, strength and hope with fellow Sub-users!
HUGS TO YOU BOTTLECAPPIE!!!
Your
SubMamma!!!
March 11th, 2008 at 7:56 pm
Now…doesn’t it feel better that you got that first one over with?
Excellently done and I can’t wait to read what you write next.
March 12th, 2008 at 12:49 pm
BC, that was a great post. Not only were you able to deal with fear (that always seems to pop up at the worst times), but you did it with honesty and class. I’m really looking forward to more posts now!
March 12th, 2008 at 2:52 pm
Holy Cow, am I ever feelin’ the love!
Prester John, Erin and Suboxone Mom -
You have all been a great support to me, and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to follow me over here and to leave even more positive reinforcement for me.
To SubMom especially, since you have been rooting for me since the first week that I started my blog, thank you. I hope you know that your kindness helped propel me through some pretty dark moments. I’m glad to know that I’ve helped you as well.
Kit and Teckla - So good to see you here too! Thank you for your kind words.
Stuart - What a lovely compliment! I’m looking forward to more posts too. In fact, I’m already working on my follow up.
March 16th, 2008 at 2:50 am
Hi…um..I just need some help. I have just been searching around online trying to find something positive and i keep hearing about this subox treatment and ive never heard of it before. It kind of sounds too good to be true. I dont have money to pay for, you know, treatment… any help out there????
March 16th, 2008 at 5:51 pm
I look forward to more posts from you!
March 17th, 2008 at 7:55 pm
Hey, RC. There’s a bunch of info on Suboxone and Subutex (the brand names of buprenorphine) on the Meditox site (www.meditoxofpalmbeach.com). Depending on where you live and the city/state health laws, insurance, and available studies, you might be able to find some help paying for Suboxone treatment. Good luck and let us know what happens.
March 18th, 2008 at 2:28 am
Congratulations on your first post and your recovery.
March 18th, 2008 at 8:21 pm
I finally made it over here! Great post, that damned procrastination and anxiety holds us back from so much in life, doesn’t it? I, like you, am trying to break that habit along with many others. It’s not easy to make a move when you feel so vulnerable, at least that is what it comes down to for me a lot of times. Congrats on taking this step ‘cappie, I look forward to reading your posts here.
Love A&J
April 17th, 2008 at 11:53 pm
Please let me know if anyone is still reading this blog as I have been in suboxone treatment for more than a year and can give some recomnmendations.
April 20th, 2008 at 3:16 am
Yes David, I too am on suboxone, I was just wondering,when did you know you had to be on it that long? Ive been on it a little over a month now and I know its to early to get off, but Iam worried about the bad withdraws that come with being on that long but I also dont want to quit so early as to be in trouble again. I have been fighting this DAMN! diease since I was 15, and Iam now 5o. SO how do you know? I know I can ask my Doc. but she says she will know, HOW? I WILL SAY THIS AS FAR AS WITHDRAWS GO THEY ARE ZILTH! I have had more than my share.If I could ever meet the guy or girl that invented it I couldnt thank him enough! Susie
May 15th, 2008 at 2:11 am
I have been going up and down in dosage. I was clean for 5 days, but are on 3mg again. I am on it for alreasy 10months and i can not seem to leave it.Do you think I should get help to get me off the Subutex?
May 15th, 2008 at 3:53 pm
What does your doctor say, Zelda? As she or he given you any guidance or ideas about what to expect in terms of the next year or so and your detox/withdrawal?